our secret self

it is one thing

to keep a secret from others

it is quite another

to keep a secret from our self


if we are unable to face our self truthfully

we will be unable to truthfully live

and self delusion becomes our true goal


that don't sound like much of a deal to me

and a form of self abuse

fear

most modern humans

including me

are afraid of fear


and the manipulators

use that situation on us


fear is just a sensation

and not worthy of our best effort


i personally am much fonder of

an other situation

which i don't yet understand


i call that situation my life in our time

what ever that means

welcome

who ever you are

the path of life

when the path of life

or the way of life

which i prefer

becomes crooked and confusing

we have forgotten how to see

and hear

and recognize life


we have come to think too much

and awareness of what actually is

a thing of the past


just and old idea maybe someone had

or maybe made up


and life goes on lifes way

and we wonder

and fight and quarrel

and sometime punish and kill

each other


we humans ain't all that bright in our time

and down right dingy

so our situation seems to me


i know i am

money

in our time

we have allowed our self

to become dependent on money


there was a time

we were dependent on life

and our self

and all our other selves


and that time is forever now

defences

the fences and walls

only isolate us

which is a very lonely place to be

and usually very fearfull


fences and walls and all those defences

is knot the path to freedom


and laws

they are just further restrictions

as are rules and regulations

and all the rest of that crap


we create these little prisons for our self

and hope for freedom

which is crazy thinking

and the source of the great insanity of our time


this is what i see

and is no source of joy and happiness

am often somewhat grumpy

and a little sad


for a while i was upset and angry

not so much anymore

that crap don't help either

and just makes our situation more difficult

knowing

knowing one doesn't know

is the first step to knowing


thinking one knows

is the first step to oblivion

whatever that means

the clock

another of those cursed inventions of humans


our time is governed by that thing

no longer by the sun and the moon

and the natural cycle of life on this little planet


our desire to change our world

has been a curse to our little world

and a rejection of what naturally is here


to live each moment of life

and keeping score (whatever that is supposed to mean - am pretty
sure life doesn't keep score and try to win,  which is a human invention -
and a creation of the lost who claim they have found the way to win at life -
which is just silliness and a symptom of ignorance)

is not the same quality of life

as living each moment as life actually is

without all that counting and keeping score


our little victories over our self and others

are pretty meaningless


awareness is not a product of thought


the one that experiences life directly

has no time for thinking about life

and wondering what life might really be


the one that understands life

would certainly never try to explain life


those that experience life

have no reason to wonder about life

Idries Shah

he made a great contribution to the human race

to be our self

first we must face the lies we were told

and then the lies we told our self

and then the lies we told others

and then our personal truth

and then the personal truth of others

and then what ever is next




control is a popular word in our time

but not actually an actual option

love

the greatest vulnerability of all

and greatly feared in our time

although kicked around a lot in our time


that word love


the experience of love

can be crippling

for those not up to facing love


and most are so afraid

death

kind of a weird word

only believed in by superstitious religious freaks

life has no end

life is forever change

and the only way to live


to seek permanence

which is a static state

is a crime against life

which life seems all ways to forgive


life is not about gain and lose

as so many seem to believe in our time


life is being

the greatest gift of all

astrology

one must be with simple numbers first

astrology is complex numbers

without all the celebration

numbers

eight

eight is an armor piercing round


nine is a bulldozer

pushing everything away


five is usually pretty sure


six mostly just wonders


one is not quite sure

what to make of all this

but is willing to make a guess


two thinks some thing is happening

when actually some thing is knot


little old three

still wonders two


four


only four can know

if completely willing

to face all this crap

beliefs

beliefs

the shackles we place

on our self


i only cherish what i know

which ain't much

and just keeps moving around

no is only a valid word

when one is facing

that which is being

said no to


to hide from life

or turn away from life

is to lose the true experience

of life


true is another of those words

that gets kicked around a lot

our life

our life

is unfolding before us

we would be much better off

or actually on

if we took part in the unfolding

yet so many have been told

to chase their dreams


dreams can be many things


life just goes on being all things

and a whole lot more

tao te ching

read a book by that title

with the name lao tsu on the front


read that book several times also


may read it again sometime


never found any answers in books

but did find a few clues

along with a lot of other crap

laws

in our time

so much energy is being put into

law enforcement

and law breaking


the only way to get rid

of law breakers

is to get rid of laws


such is the way of life

how we feel

most modern people

credit others for how they feel


you make me feel good

you make me feel bad

and on and on and on


that stuff is just bullshit

where i come from

the network of thought

jiddu krishnamurti

read a little book by that title

with his name on the front


i read it several times

i may still have a copy

will probably read that book again


maybe

what we say

what we say

is knot what matters

what we are

what we are being

is what matters

this world

this world can be very confusing

if one thinks too much

and we are all one


awareness is not a product of thought

the man was lost

the man was lost and almost broken
when from within these words were spoken
rise up my son  -  for i am with you
you feel alone but that is not true

i'm the life that fills your heart
i've been with you from the start
you've let ideas fill your head
not listened to a word i've said

for i am all and know you well
you turned away  -  that's why you fell
i will guide you through this life
in this time of so much strife

my life is the life of all
i'm the source of great and small
but most today don't hear my voice
and each is free to make his choice

yet blessing life is all i do
my love is boundless  -  ever true
this gift is all i ever share
my blessings put an end to care

but love's a gift  -  i do not force
all are free to choose  -  of course
man receives what he does give
try loving all  -  like me  -  and live

no more time

no more time to stand around
all those dreams still not quite found
now the truth is clear to me
i've lost enough and now i'm free

the game of life i'll never win
they lied to me  -  but that's their sin
mine was falling for their story
fantastic tales of wealth and glory

many think they know the way
but don't believe in what they say
creation makes us what we are
and each must follow his own star

no matter what the world thinks true
you find the truth inside of you
to lose your self too much in thought
will lead to being what your not

in silent moments here inside
i found the spark that almost died
and regained what i had lost
that precious gift beyond all cost

our essence is what's rightly made
its truth is through the heart relayed
but we must heed the spirits call
that lives within the heart of all

ancient sages

ancient sages spoke the word
of living spirit  -  which they heard
inside the heart  -  for men then knew
that life was love and ever true

but there were those who would not serve
the source of life  -  and the did curve
away from truth and love and grace
and these became the human race

all are precious in lifes eyes
yet all are free  -  and now man cries
for in his freedom he did choose
to serve himself and he did lose

the gift of love for ever giving
from the source forever living
and soon man found himself alone
no more love from his heart shown

sickness plagued the path he walked
by fears his would was ever stalked
the child of life could now know pain
and sorrows seemed to flow like rain

all of this still need not be
but man himself must come to see
that life eternal does exist
and man himself chose to resist

man today

man today live with such flair
but all receive that which they share
we lie and hide the truth inside
and as you see  -  most love has died

the laws of life cannot be broken
and life returns what we have spoken
to hide the truth just walls us in
darkness comes   -  we live in sin  -  penned in

love and truth are both the same
life's the source from which we came
to share the gift will get you more
this is what we're all born for

but most today do not share love
must want to take and push and shove
our live result from what we do
tho this is recognized by few

if it were we'd change our ways
put a stop to all this craze
love will stop the pain and strife
but we must share love with all life

life itself is the source
of this blessing of eternal love
which man receives within his heart
when all resistance does depart

mans pain

all mans pain has been self made
for from the truth he once had strayed
and cut himself off from the source
that hold the stars and world on course

man himself sought his own power
tho he did not create one flower
still he thought he could do better
life's own plan is just a fetter

we now can see how man has done
the painful course his life has run
killing now fills every day
sickness is the price we pay

the source of life is still intact
tho it's the truth  -  while we just act
life and love can still be here
if truth itself we do not fear

our pride has led us to this pain
self-pity now our great refrain
anger fills the soul like lead
fears and dreams now fill our head

still in truth it's not too late
but to the truth we must relate
no more hiding from the light
so love again can make things right

divides

divided over where we go
what we do and what we show

seems to me  -  now that i'm old
it makes no sense what i've been told

the truth inside must first be found
or life is one big run around

if you don't be just who you are
you'll wind up wishing on some star

and wishing always leads to sorrow
always living for tomorrow

but what about your life today
just dreaming lets it slip away

the here and now is what we are
truth  can never be that far

let the whole of now be lived
so nothing has to be re-lived

as the pages pass

as the pages pass before me
ages  -  ages  -  all were born free

in their time to pass away
as night must yield to each new day

so worry not what lies ahead
for in the end when all is said

life will serve us all just right
there is no way to lose the light

when you wonder what is true
the answers all lie inside you

just cease that endless mental chatter
that makes us crazy as a hatter

be still to hear the endless force
that holds the world on its true course

and you will find out what you are
the wind and rain and brightest star

much time has passed

much time has passed since i was young
not much has really changed

the game goes on and i'm still here
not changed  -  but re-arranged

hy heart still cries  -  i love it so
and spring still brings me joy

yes i'm alive and i don't mind
inside i'm still a boy

much time has passed yet i still play
in this land of terror

no more to hang my head and cry
i don't regret the error

mistakes were made  -  i bless them so
for through them i did learn

if you're going to play the game
you better learn to burn

affection

most people are afraid of affection

which makes them feel vurnable

and not in control


love terrifies them


control is a curse word

and a great crime against life

academics

the brain thinker people

with all those ideas in their heads


the wizards will work many wonders

seems like i read that somewhere


awareness is not a product of thought

courage

those that live by courage

are afraid of fear


cur rage

a cur is a mongrel


fear is just another emotion to be faced

and emotions are hardly cherished in our time


accept maybe for sympathy

which is a substitute for any sort of natural response to life


modern people seem to love feeling sorry for people

and furry little things


many are also fond of anger

which is a form of self pity

choice

only the blind one chooses


the one that sees

has no choice


this is my feeble attempt at homage

to my friend

and his friend

and her friend

and those that would be the friend

need

when we ignore the true needs of the children

and subject them to our ideas of what they should be

the sacred trust has been betrayed

and our future is uncertain

life is for ever

but suffering is an option if we seek falsehoods

as we gratify our petty little egos

with all our pride and arrogance and self admiration

as we look down upon and punish those that don't agree

with our petty stupid little ideas

which are just the imagination of those asleep and dreaming

the way

we each must find our own way

perhaps the way that owns us


there are those that are supportive of our search

and those that would prey on us as we search


our truth is all we actually have

or actually has us


life is the gift

and forever free

no matter how hard we try to enslave it


when we try to reshape our self

we are no better than those that seek to shape us

according to some weird idea they have become fascinated with

words

there are those who abuse words

and do not speak truthfully


such is how the lost speak

as they seek to make us all like them

so they will feel better

and more secure

and more like them


selling and profit are deficit forms of life

utilized by those that no nothing of the gift of life


rejection is a dangerious game to play

and leads only to greater lack

and hunger and frustration and greed

and the desire to control


which leads to the great nowhere of our time


and life goes on without us


this does not have to be so

but those that seek life

have already rejected life


life is what we are

what we all are


all us humans

and the creatures of the field

and the field

and the birds and the bees

and the flowers and the trees


and to all a good night

love

the only way to find love

is to be love


to seek love

is to reject love

and become sentimental

and often hateful and bitter

just some form of emotional weirdness


often to blame others

for the results of our personal abuse

war

there are those that believe

the flag of war is the answer


no one ever won a war

ask anyone who ever fought one


war poisons the soul of man

and his little world


our salvation lies not in what we think

or believe or hope or wish


our salvation exists in what we are

what we all are

and all that is

fear

the weapon and tool

of slavers


punishment is their creed

faith

those that have faith

do not know

mostly they hope and pray


beleaveing is a poor substitute

for being


i did not misspell be leave

the fruits of the modern world thing

have tasted the fruits

of the modern world thing

it left a bitter taste in my mouth


am glad i am not what i once was

a few lives back

when i would have had a sword in my hand

shouting "to the death" to the oppressors of our time


that didn't help back then

and it won't help now


our truth is the only gift


all our hopes and wishes

is what got us here


escape is a false god

as is security

blame

to blame an other

for your situation with your self

is to throw away your sovereignty

the most sacred gift of All

remember

remember too much

and you will lose you mind

and your way


life is forever now

positive thinking

a form of mental masturbation

as is negative thinking


what little value thinking has

exists only in the neutral state


to be for or against anything

is to divide life

which is a form of insanity


life is forever whole

clocks

we would be better off without clocks

time is just a delusion


our situations change

and our perspective

but we don't


life is the center of all

and life is what we are


respect is more than a word

respect is a gift to our self


true respect is to cherish all that is

and is not

the moon is in virgo

venus is in aquarius

as is mercury


neptune is in pisces

jupiter in cancer

and uranus in aries


mars is retrograde in libra

as is saturn in scorpio


the sun is in pisces

and the moon will be full tomorrow


do you know what time it is


(just noticed tomorrow is today)

knowing

that which is not possible

for us humans

yet so many claim to possess

and so many fear


being is a clue


no one has yet to try to explain being to me


if you still need an explanation

you are still lost

friend

when i was younger

i sought friend as the liberator

but in truth

friend turned out to be the anchor



modern times have been very confusing to me

manage

just another curse word

like fuck

truth

i really don't know

but i feel very fortunate

that life has permitted me to wonder

the hurricane

an old 1937 movie i am watching


freedom is more than a word

a hokey little poem

each must in his own time choose
both how to win and how to loose
for all must learn in time you see
what is right for them to be

although the road is long and tight
and the forest filled with fright
there is but one way to live
with open heart that's free to give

blessings come for those who share
who hold back nothing  -  without care
for the gift of life is free
tho this is sometimes hard to see

for love is not held in the hand
and that which is is only sand
truth and love are both a part
of what's found only in the heart

only love can heal this land
and redeem this weary band
for you get what you do give
open up your heart to live


the heart is not actually that little muscle in your chest

but what makes it beat is a clue


life is beyond the thing plane

and a microscope will never reveal our truth

nor will a telescope

or psycho therapy

what ever the hell that crap means


mind is not a product of the brain organ

although the science people like to claim it is


awareness is not a product of thought

chaos and confusion and conflict are products of thought

and most are lost in this great blizzard of ideas

love

that which has nothing to do with want

or any form of desire


pisces is the golden gate

and scorpio the end of time


cancer is need

scorpio is want

pisces is freedom

for those that face their truth

the truth of all


wants and needs and hopes and dreams

are the shackles so many crave


some in our time live in prisons of stone

most in prisons of skin

big

no matter how big you get

life is always greater

ideas

ideas are bubbles blown in the ocean

Life is the Ocean

problems

i know a guy who seems to think

he has a problem with his father

when actually

he has a problem with his self


countries are not immune to this situation


usually with other countries

that won't submit to their will

sometimes with their people

Love

have always wondered about Love


finally realized affection was a clue

Life

the scientist looks for life

beyond the stars

and in the smallest particle


the preacher speaks of life

after we are dead


We Are All Life

Every Creature

Every Tree

You And Me

personal image

when the politicians and our so called leaders

make decisions that effect us all

which are based on protecting and cultivating

their public image

they are neglecting their responsibility

to we the people out here in the land


my father only told me what to do

one time in his whole life

and i was around 50 years when he died


the one thing he said to me

in that tone of voice

was "be a man"


he seemed a little worried about me


actually there was one other time

i was probably 14 years old

and made a sarcastic remark to my mother

he said "come here boy" and we went into another room

and then he said to me

"if you don't respect that woman because she's your mother  -
that's my wife and i don't want you talking to her that way"

and i never did again


he called me boy most of the time

and sometimes meat head

i liked him a lot

and still do