to do no harm

perhaps the greatest gift of all


in this current life experience

i have seen great harm done to the childre

willfully and maliciously


and great harm to the creatures of the field

and the field


the creatures of the field bully each other all the time

as is their nature


human kind has a much greater potential than the creatures of the field

but the creatures of the field do not threaten this little planet

as human kind is currently doing

and has been for quite some time


perhaps we are the problem


has anyone ever looked into that

all life

all life is sacred

even the grass we walk on

and those we don't agree with


without respect for life

we are less than nothing

and a threat to our little world

and our self

courage

a false god

as is fear


they are two sides of the same nickle

as are pride and shame

what we have to face to be free

first we have to face what we pretend to be


then we have to face who we are


there are those who are not pretending

but very few in our time


most today promote their cover story

which is how they kill their human expression

and live a lie

which ain't really living


it will not be possible to love me

if you cannot love your self

i'm tired

and am not quite sure what to say now


i may just go lay down

had catarac surgery today

killing

killing is sometimes required on this plane


killing with hatred is the greatest crime of all

and can only lead to forgiveness


and there ain't no way to cheat

hatred

the greatest disease of all


and so many in our time wish to fly that flag

the creatures of the field and sky

are one with nature


the modern human

who now thinks

is a figment of his own imagination

and no longer one with nature


ideas are creations of the lost and alone

pain

how does one be open to pain


pain is just like everything else


if you can't be open to it

it will kill you


life is forever a clue

and never an answer


such is what life has been for me


and i am still here

matters

i don't even know what mattering means

and am not sure what matters


but matter does exist


as do i

there is more to life

than what we are doing

looking

so often we look

so rarely we see


and sometimes we quit looking

and then we go blind


when openness is not to be found

there is great sorrow upon the land

the thing

most today have acknowledged the validity of the thing


but not all

the straight arrow

life is all the is

which certainly must make life difficult



straight means in our time to be only one thing


and i get confused

because life is all that is to me



sometimes my lines intersect


intercetions


lots of control devices at the intercetions

eight

seemed to me the greatest number of all

until i met a nine

which was just a zero with a tail

to control life

would be the greatest sacrilige

and a great curse upon all that is sacred


so life seems to me

what i call my life is just happening

i have no sense of control over anything

and experience nothing to take credit for

or anything to take blame for mostly


mostly i just wonder

and show up and take part as i can

and the girl did not know how to give

for she had never been accecpted


anthough a couple of times excepted

it is a stupid word

as is that

and mine

and yours

and ours


our words are so small

those that would hurt girls

make it very difficult to call the friend


and to hurt a child

makes it almost impossible to me


it is the clue

the day the war started

or perhaps the day it ended


april 12, 2013


3 12 13


all simple numbers

there are those who go to where we once were

and those that go where we are yet to be

my father

now he never actually spoke to me

but he was there


that is about the best i ever did

and i am a bragert

desperately lost and alone

where we are in my time

if you happen to be me



most are not

but a few remember me


sometimes without regret

the lonelyest people in the world

that would be me

and my friend i call jim

and a girl i like i call terri


and all my other friends

bea

she was a girl i liked


i feel so fortunate

that there have been so many

afraid and fearless

not yet quite sure how all that works out

we don't walk in line

and we don't do the party line


who are we


that is the quest ye on

bound by convention

a pretty terrible place to be


have no use for conventions


my experience has been

somewhere other people decide how things will be for me


and i seem to be one that chooses for himself

and on his better days lets life choose

and don't much give a dam who you think i should be

what do you say to the perfect woman

hello

if you can

the sessions

a movie i watched tonight


i liked the movie a lot


it was about us cripples

i was learning how to see a woman

and she was afraid to see me

want

the ultimate selfish word

the two ways to be with a girl

one is to give the girl what she wants


the other is to not give the girl what she wants


there is another way

but that way has nothing to do with what we want

if i hadn't had the balls to face me

there would only be one of us here

and the clock approaches midnight

if it were not what they call day light savings time

why won't he just go to sleep

that is what i have so often wondered

life

life is just me right now

without all that speculation


awareness is not a product of thought

and neither am i

and neither are you

whoever you might be

or i might be



might is a silly little word

and i wonder who is kissing you now

an old song

from a long time ago


when i cared


the sad part is

i have always cared

and i always will

so many wonder who did the walls and the roof

i don't wonder as often as i once did

but when i do

there is the ever present ceiling


and i wonder who did the floor


if there happens to be a floor in our time

catarac surgery

that can effect how one sees


which is what has just happened to me

the possibility of being wrong

that only comes about if one wants to be right


which is sometimes called wright

life

life was old and out of date

they day "it" was born

i just forgot what i was about to say

remembering is just dying all over again

had catrac surgery today

seemed to go pretty well

i liked heather

and dr. bogey did a great job


dr. bogey is kind of cute

which i found unusual for a doctor

the god word

for me god means all that is


that's the only way i can do that paritcular word


and all that is

is all that we are


we is the clue


as is all

a war of the people

all wars are against people


we are all people

as are the creatures of the field

and the field

want

the most dangerious word on this planet

and probably a few others


a cursed word

and not worthy of our consideration


and such a popular word in our time


to serve that word

is a sad road to walk


and no longer a friend of mine

what mr berko said

i happen to agree

he said they can't fix this thing

it is far too complicated

i noticed that years ago

and i ain't all that bright


but we can be who we are

and find out if life still responds to truth

have wondered if anyone actually spoke to me

a few did

far less than a dozen

but a few

am not sure what i should do

perhaps i should do nothing

and just wait and see what happens


over the past few years has become my favorite choice

cause i don't know has been my only response to this situation

my eyes

they don't work so good anymore

and have not for a while


the eye doctors claim they can make that so again


tuesday i will find out if such things are true

or possible from where i am

some lines come together

some lines don't


intersecting lines are a curiousity to me


as is life


i have no control over anything


and finally don't need that crap

everyone wants to be noticed

and no one is quite sure what that means


and the best of us will never find out


and the best of us died a long time ago


even before we were born into this hell hole

smoke gets in your eyes

and old song from a long time ago

when music was still music

the untouchable one

leads to two

and tragidy is upon the land

modest

am not sure what that word means

perhaps a secret


am not sure what secret means

i don't know

the story of my life

my friend

they have all been my friend


and i did not yet know

that they was a form of rejection


as is them

and those

and that

yes

my favorite word


no is a dumb word


and i am still prejudice


perhaps god will help me

the untouchable ones

now that is a worthy question

and question is knot the way


one is a very simple number

and like zero

not a number at all


numb burr

another clue

once i was of the poets

and once of the warriors

but mostly of the fools

help

and the trick is

recognizing what help actually is

and who we are actually trying to help

attractive

a selfish word

and i sign of personal greed


need can only lead to greed


the creatures of the field wean their offspring

humans not so much anymore


mostly we modern humans seek to destroy the field

and create some sort of unnatural place to be

profit

the curse of our time


greed is a harsh mistress

and an unforgiving bitch

has been my experience with personal gain


when personal gain is the only goal

life becomes a very lonly existance

and alone is a very lonly place to be


to reject life is to reject our self

and our personal experience

which is all we have here in a place like this

and nothing seems so little to us capitalist

and no thing is what we actually are

as is every thing

the virgin girl

there is the truth of the virgin girl

and the truth of the girl who is not a virgin


and here we are

as we can be

or perhaps not be

as is sometimes the case


case is the clue

in our time

know thy self

now that is good advice

i read that somewhere


the only way to know ones self

is to be open to ones self

and live the truth of ones existence


our reactions are a clue to our conditioning

our responses are a clue to our nature

wanting

if we don't free ourselves from that situation

heavens gate will remain closed


and hoping for heaven after your dead

is just bullshit to me


heaven is a state of being

and we have forgotten how to be

no one deserves to be a prisoner

not matter what they have done


and that is what i have to say about that

to be a man

such is not permitted in our time

has been my experience


that stuff wasn't so bad to me

but to not permit woman

now that was a great crime if your me


and i am the boy that just said that

our problem

some people think our problem is what we use to escape


alcohole

drugs

coffee

our jobs

our family

all the various disney lands of our time


our problem is our desire for escape


our rejection of our situation


our great saddness about being born in this place

and this situation